Does good wine equal good….

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The ladies in my carnival group recently had this discussion.

“Does good wine equate to good sex?”

I know this has been discussed from time immemorial but I think it is always discussed from the woman’s point of view and most people answer the same way. The answer that has been repeated over and over again is ” there is no link between wining ability and sex ability”.
This is one of the stereotypical answers very similar to the “muscle men have small buddy” argument that rubs me the wrong way (as someone who considers him self a good winer and at least a little muscular!). The entire male stripper industry would be non existent if that were true.

Well people….I am here to mash down these lies!

Well kinda mash them down….

Well at least suggest an alternative answer!

Think of it this way.

If you have someone who is a professional footballer…and tell them to play tennis….will they do better or worse than a non athletic person in the same situation?
If you have a scholar in one field asked to do some experiments in another field, will they do better than a layperson?

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The experienced male winer does not gain that experience in a vacuum, wining in front of the bathroom mirror. The good male winer is an excellent judge of pace and movement, keeps a steady beat no matter how off key the girl is, holds his drink straight regardless of crazy jukk, dodges crazy hairstyles from the winee, keeps an eye out for the next wine despite bright flashing party lights, wines down low till his quads burn (and makes sure she stands up first!), and is capable of pelting waist at a level that puts fear into his partners eyes!

Men like this have experience, men like this are LESS likely to be inexperienced nincompoops in bed.  They carry that wining experience with them to the bedroom.  Now, again I have to qualify this by saying there is a lot more to good sex than just waistline.  You have to know how to make love to the mind……BUT no matter what you do, if your waistline flop…..she ago say yu flop!

Now I’m not saying the good winer/nincompoop lover doesn’t exist but I would wager its less common than the nincompoop winer/nincompoop lover combination.  And of course we still have to big up the nincompoop winer/good lover crew….

So ladies if you decide one day to take a chance on someone u meet in a dance….choose wisely….choose good wine!

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Fellas, if your wining skill isn’t up to scratch…I implore you. Go to carnival and practice…practice like its going out of style…practice like your reputation depends on it. And while you are at it, make sure you sort out the body too! Don’t let me down!

Choose wisely!

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